Don't Be A Gary

If you thought it was bad to be a Karen, that was a walk in the park compared to being a Gary. Seriously, don’t be a Gary. Everyone with a brain will hate you and demand you step down from whatever tower of power you hail from.

Signs you might be a Gary.

1. You push people down specifically to kick them while they are down. 
2. You take pride in being the worst version of yourself.
3. You have the opposite of the Midas Touch.
4. Intelligent people cannot think of a word bad enough for you, so your name is now a profound insult.
5. Your leadership is a catalyst for divorce and homelessness.
6. Your leadership inspires people to quit their jobs during a recession.
7. Being a racist serial killer would improve your reputation.
8. People expatriate to get away from you.
9. The highlight of your career is the worst performance review in the history of your current position.
10. Most of the letters received by Santa ask for your resignation.
11. People would rather drink antifreeze than have your financial advice.
12. You have been diagnosed with “Securi-betes”, a terrifying mental illness causing a person to think everything is "a security".
13. Projectile vomiting is the natural reaction retail investors have when you start talking.
14. You have been nominated as the poster child for mandatory sterilization. 
    
15. An apparel line is created to mock and shame your success at being an epic failure.

If you are a Gary, bow your head and take the walk of shame right to jail. We know you participated in making the Eth Monopoly reality, so do not pass go and give retail investors reparations for your shenanigans Dirty Gary.